Trial by Error

The family traveled for the first time together and went up to San Francisco just for a day. My friend Jen Jeon was getting married and after debating whether we should leave Sydnie with my parents, we decided it was a short enough trip to take her with us. So I guess to avoid their ears from hurting with the pressure change you should have the baby suck on a bottle, pacifier, etc... during take off - Take off was around Sydnie's feeding time so I decided to try to feed her - the only problem was from the time the plane started to move to the actual time we were on the runway, she was done eating! So while she wanted nothing more of the boob, I was frantically trying to shove it back in her mouth! I guess I got a little paranoid but beyond the pain she would feel I was more panicked at her crying and people giving us dirty looks! haha! Regardless, either way, it turned out fine and on the way back she ate and fell asleep the rest of the way. We tried our best to travel lightly but definitely not as easy. We saw so many families with strollers and car seats on top of strollers... goodness - no wonder they let you pre-board! Even from this short trip, I learned a few lessons about traveling with a baby.
1) If you have a large stroller, even if you have to borrow, take a light travel stroller instead. We have the bugaboo which we love but not great for travel purposes. You can buy the transport bag and check it in but that's not that cheap either. On the way back we just ended up getting two gate check in tickets, but it would have been easier had we just had a light stroller.
2) Wasn't sure how Sydnie would take to a foreign crib and we definitely were not going to be bringing her pack n play for a day trip. So we took the crib sheet saver she uses to give her something familiar. Not sure that was the reason, but she slept well! Love this crib sheet saver thing by the way. Its such a pain to wash and change out her sheets all the time, especially if she spits up, so this thing is great to lay flat near the head area and wash this only.
3) A light diaper bag is a must! Well this one is my fault because I took the petunia pickle bottom CAKE, which my sister got me. This one already weighs 10 pounds empty! Okay not that much but either way, lesson learned to take something light or your shoulders will DIE.
4) It does help to have the baby in a carrier, especially at the airport. I personally have never used a bjourn but my baby carrier was great for me since I could just roll it up in a ball once we got in the plane.
5) I've gotten a little dependent on my brest friend when feeding Sydnie, so finding a travel version was great! We also used it on the plane and once Sydnie fell asleep while eating she continued to sleep right on it and my arms were free. It did help having Steve blowing it up for me but it takes less than a minute.

So whoever says life is over after kids, I would have to disagree... it was very nice to share our first family trip together and hopefully there will be many more!

this one is appa's new favorite pic of sydnie!

unHappy Fathers Day

I spent this past weekend with a fever and Steve spent his first official dad day taking care of Sydnie the entire time. I think my body was shocked from sudden exposure to outside civilization now that I'm back at work.

We even had to cancel our dinner plans the next day for him, but as usual, he was a trooper and enjoyed his exclusive appa time with Sydnie.

me sick with sydnie on my lap







I can now understand why some women who are ill or in extreme pain after labor might not get to breastfeed. I've never had to care for anyone else when I've been sick so it was very hard to get up and feed Sydnie every few hours. I didn't want to hold her other than feeding time so she kept on giving me her upside down U face when I would look over at her.
But I think with a combination of going back to work and getting sick my boobs died. Sydnie was unhappy every time she was trying to eat and my mom would tell me she felt light, which made me even sadder. I started taking fenugreek a few days ago and I think it is helping. Its a lot to take - basically two capsules three times a day. But since yesterday Sydnie hasn't been fussy when eating. Some of the side effects I hear is you start to smell like maple syrup but I think I smell like curry! Of course that would happen to me!

We also finally started her on cloth diapers after going through our great supply of disposables that friends have given us. So far so good! I have ten total and it seems to be enough where we need to wash only every other day and we'll still use the disposables for sleeping. Bum Genius is the way to go! Sydnie's butt looks pretty gigantour though when she's sleeping on her tummy.

Sydnie got her first taste of rice cereal this week - with my dead boob, thought it might be a good time to start the cereal to give her some more substance. I guess its pretty obvious that we weren't too prepared with our plastic spoon from PF Changs! Thanks Susie for the cereal! Sydnie did great though and only showed frustration when we were too slow feeding. Girl's got attitude.

Four Month Checkup

We had Sydnie's four month checkup and shots.
She's in the 95th percentile for her height but pretty average with her weight in the 55th percentile and her head is in the 30th percentile. Steve was a little bummed that her head size grew a bit from her two month where she was in the 20th percentile! haha

Work is already starting to feel busy. It wasn't so horrible being apart from Sydnie but considering I don't get to keep her to myself anymore I definitely didn't feel like sharing her once I was home!
Well as a mom with four months experience, I wanted to share just a few of my personal 'can't live without' things that have kept me afloat these past months!:
* Chick Fil A: This place is truly a testimony to how God is faithful to those that are faithful to Him... even though they close every Sunday, Steve and I frequent this place Monday thru Saturday! They are good for any time of the day and their food is always fresh and healthy and light. My favorites are the chick-n-minis and breakfast burrito for breakfast and their chargrilled chicken & fruit salad is pretty yummy. I like the berry balsamic vinaigrette. They have a sweet but good lemon pie and also serve southern sweet tea! Go Chick Fil A!
* Tiny Love: Sydnie loves the symphony mobile for the crib and we also have a clip n go mobile we can attach to pretty much anything!
* Genesis Spa Pedicure: Nicky is the person to ask for there - she gives the BEST pedicures lasting nearly a month! And their prices are great at $19 for a mani / pedi combo.
* Lecithin: GNC sells a decent sized bottle and good price - these are great for frequent clogged ducts. It definitely has made a difference for me. Frequent clogged ducts can be an indication that the fat in your body is clogging up your ducts (meaning I am FAT!) - the lecithin seems to help suspend the fat for you.
I'll continue to share my favorites in future entries!

Sydnie was also baptized this past Sunday! She was very well behaved.


As easy as it will be to be consumed with grades, appearance, etc... I hope Steve and I can be most successful and most satisfied in raising our Sydnie as a woman of God and pleasing and loving Him!

So many fun and creative gifts for babies! The traditional but elegant diaper cake, a bouquet made out of onesies and baby socks, and a doll made out of cloth diapers, dressed in a onesie, tutu and ballet slippers!

Welcome Back

After four exclusive months of physical pains, emotions, and intense joys with Sydnie, today was my first day back to work! The skirt that I chose to wear was tighter than I hoped but seemed to be my only option without going into my bin of maternity clothes - and not that I enjoy wearing nylons but it was actually nice being able to wear normal nylons for once.
Leaving Sydnie this morning wasn't too difficult but I think the hard part isn't so much the first day but when I find myself spending more hours in the office than I do with Sydnie. Hopefully I can better balance the two... I've technically known my little girl for only four months and I think it is way too early to treat her as if we've been "dating" for years!
So as I sit here updating our blog, I am also nursing a very angry clogged duct(s). One of the feared ramifications of returning to work and trying to pump came true the first day back. Apparently my boob does not enjoy being BF's with the pump =). I did leave the office a little early hoping I could get Sydnie to help with the relief but we were unsuccessful. Gosh, what to do if this continues?!?! Well we'll try again tomorrow. For today, I'm going to have to take a few more advil and hope sleep will overcome the pain.
Other than that, work was relatively quiet for day one. I did have to stop myself a few times from calling home to see how my mom and Sydnie were doing. And pumping at my desk is very strange considering how exposed you feel! No, I'm not pumping in the open but even still, its just weird! My sister always gets on my case for sharing TMI in our blog but I just found myself laughing today realizing that I can no longer pass gas freely like I would at home! haha! I'm so sorry for any of my coworker friends reading this but pregnancy has increased my intenstinal turbulence and I have to remind myself now that my work appearance also includes not smelling like last night's broccoli! haha... sorry!
Well I have to keep this entry short and try to go get this plug out before tomorrow! Ughh! I'll try to post an update before the week ends. Here are some pictures of Sydnie - we're trying to pose her for her birth announcements. We weren't too successful but we think she still looks so cute! =)

Best Friends Forever...

Steve was not too happy this weekend as both Sydnie and I were bombing him with our bang-gu(s) so he couldn't escape the smelly wrath of his ladies! What was funny is that sydnie's smelled identical to mine! Although I don't think Steve found that to be too amusing... I must have had something that didn't sit well with me but poor Sydnie had to suffer the same consequences!
I have to say I am loving this cool weather. If you are a person that prefers the heat my theory is you must like your arms. That way when its hot, you have no problem putting on a tanktop. Me personally, I have always preferred covering up but especially with my extra weight I feel a lot of jiggling in my arms and upper back! I have resorted to purchasing some jergens gradual tanning body lotion to try to create an optical illusion around my flab... while that may help a little with the visual appearance, I am in for a huge reality check when I try on my work suits next week! Gosh I hope something fits!!!
Of course that isn't my biggest worry. I just can't believe it's already time to go back! It was so nice not having to work Memorial Day weekend for once! I know its highly unlikely but I torture myself into thinking I will no longer be Sydnie's favorite person! =) There really is something so rewarding about knowing someone prefers you over anyone else (well except her dad of course...) So I guess a part of me fears not being her one and only BFF. I also hate thinking I might have to hear about some of her "firsts" second hand so I was extra thrilled when she rolled and giggled for us last week! As overwhelming as the responsibility of being her parent is, I'm even more overwhelmingly committed to the role so I'm not really liking the idea of seeing her for just a few short hours each day. Steve and I used to say that we spend more time with our co-workers than we do each other but at least we could email and talk on the phone... maybe I'll take my baby video monitor to work and have my mom just keep it on Sydnie all day! haha
So starting next week, my new BF will be my breastpump =)
I'm sure many moms go through these same mental struggles and each comes to their own decision. I actually really like my job so it isn't just about a paycheck but the professional accomplishments I enjoy. Perhaps that is my pride speaking. Well no need to be hasty. My faith is so lacking to be worrying so much about this and I should trust there already is a perfect course laid out for me. Ultimately I know I am still way too consumed with ME but I hope to decrease that, be more prayeful, and as cliche as it always sounds - trust in God!
Sneeze - Phase I
Sneeze - Phase II

of course Steve thinks she looks more like me here!
End Sneeze


rolling over documented - umma is much more animated!


giggling with appa in between hiccups

Breaking apart...

I have toe nail fungus.
Please examine Exhibit A.
Its bad enough having an infection on my boobs but I guess my body is susceptible to any similar infection... not sure where I got it from. The girl I go to for pedicures thinks it was from another salon that used dirty tools (nasty!). Steve thinks it's from his athletes foot! Wherever its from I've been reading up on it and was told to soak it in Listerine. What all the websites failed to mention was that the blue one stains your feet! AHHHHH!!! And I literally soaked my feet forever! I pumped, painted my nails, watched Dancing with the Stars... If you see me in sandals and blue feet, please don't smirk!
The fungus is just one of many ailments in my ongoing saga. So remember I mentioned my achy knees? Well apparently it is because I am overcompensating for my weak hips! I must sound like a hypochondriac but I really am not exaggerating. What am I getting at?!?! Before pregnancy & labor, sure I complained about pains here and there but I never knew that having a baby not only affects your physical appearance but really does a number on all the other parts of your body! Per my personal experience, I say don't fool yourself with an epidural thinking you just need to get through labor because it is possible that is just the beginning of all your fun!
You know another thing is pregnancy these days is really not an excuse for "eating for two". Maybe because I carried weight all over and not just in the middle, but I did feel more self conscious about my weight gain. And I hated being compared to someone that was due around the same time, especially if she was a lot smaller! I mean, it's not like you can suck in your stomach nor can you start dieting! And the same goes for after having the kid... now its about who loses the weight faster. I have many friends that delivered around the same time I did and it can get quite depressing to hear that so and so is thinner than ever, while I stand in front of the mirror deceiving myself into thinking my stomach looks pretty okay but then I sit down and I have a flubby tire around my waist... or better yet if I flick my stomach it'll jiggle uncontrollably. And please stop saying they lost it because they are breastfeeding because I am too and that makes me feel worse! =)
But you know what?!?! I love being Sydnie's mom! =) So maybe one day I'll have to submit an entry for Extreme Makeover because I've let myself go after being so absorbed with family, but for now I'll live and accept what I've got! And we celebrated Sydnie's 100 day this past weekend! The family enjoyed a nice dinner at the St. Regis - it was nasty hot but hopefully we'll have some nice pictures to share soon. Oh and she flipped and giggled for us this week! Yay baby!!! Happy 100 days our Sydnie!

Appa and Sydnie's flexibility
Sydnie in her Mother's Day outfit

I love my Tiny Love Symphony mobile

I also love my hand
And I love Appa!

Reaching a Mommy Milestone

This past week was... actually quite uneventful! Does that mean I am coming to terms with being a mom?!?! How appropriate with this past Sunday being Mother's Day =) Well I'm sure the week itself had its usual Sydnie ups and downs but rather than feeling like someone's driving a stake through me, it actually is becoming more the norm and what I consider to be my life! It really is quite amazing that we all eventually settle into this new life. I'm sure all the seasoned moms reading this blog are thinking "newbie" as you read about my anxieties and chaos. Well things are far from being perfected, and I know I'll be learning something new EVERYDAY(!) forever, but I remember when Sydnie was a week old thinking three months seemed SOOOOO far away and never thought we would be able to make it this far without completely falling apart! Well, here we are and for the most part, still intact!
So the new D-Day for me is the return to work day, which is scheduled for June. I ask myself everyday, can I really do it?! Well I hear a few more women at work announced they were expecting. You know, even though men are just as responsible, if its not your own wife, I wonder if they are thinking... "another woman pregnant!". I think if I was a man, I would. I actually felt a little guilty towards work when I did get pregnant. It was already hard enough to balance home and work life even before and now reaching this juncture has me rethinking what is really of importance... I do find myself envious of those family situations where both mom & dad have the luxury of working from home or at least being able to be home the majority of the time. I seriously should have gone to study graphic design... or win the lotto! =)
Steve got a new camera (again) so I have high expectations for our pictures from this point forward...
I think I mentioned it before, but Sydnie is infatuated with staring at her hand
Someone said drooling indicates good digestion... if that's the case, Sydnie must have awesome digestion! She is slobbergirl!