Friday, 08/08/08 Sydnie is six months old. The day will also sadly end my career as Sydnie's 맘마(food)... Well on the positive, it'll mean good bye to pumping at work, clogged ducts, and all the various aches and pains I've associated with breastfeeding these past few months. But for someone that never even wanted to breastfeed in the first place in fear of super saggage and really trivial superficial stuff, I am really going to miss the bonding moments I've been able to share with Sydnie. I actually would love to continue but as I even to this day struggle with my milk supply and duct problems, I consulted with Steve last week and consented that I have been stubborn long enough and it is finally time to throw in the towel. Regardless of my difficulties though I am so thankful to see our healthy daughter with her chubalicious thighs and arms that remind me of pat & oscar breadsticks (fat and doughy!) And although she already has battled a few colds in her short life, I credit breastmilk for her speedy recoveries.
So the ultimate decision was made when Steve being the ever active dad surprised us with a baby scale. I guess one of those luxuries I never planned on purchasing, but I was excited to use it and see how much Sydnie was eating. I was also hoping it would ease my mind considering how horrible my production was with pumping. So we started with the right side and were really excited to see she consumed about 3 1/2 ounces. Then left side... no change on scale. Tried again... nothing. Maybe the scale isn't working, let's put a towel on her to see if it moves... okay it does ~ so does that mean she got nothing from the left?!?! I started to feel depressed. We tried it again the next feeding and same result. So it seemed my left boob was truly dead and it wasn't really the pump's fault nothing was coming out.
So I hope to eek it out for another few weeks - hang in there righty! I had an epiphane today... its funny how we started this cycle with supplementing with formula and as we come to closing the cycle we're needing to do the same thing!
In my finite thinking I am truly amazed at God's creativity in not only allowing us to be a source of food for our children (as difficult as it may sometimes be) but also provide comfort and strengthen our bond with them! Now I just need to prepare for possible torture that weekend - I hope it is not too painful! Any tips?!
Sydnie went swimming for the first time this week!